July 30 (Th) 2015 A random thought and a reflection on a student's email.

Crystal Huang
6 hrs · Edited ·

Friends asked why I posted so many during last few days.
Share you with a secret:
Hurray! I happily wrapped up my summer teaching and submitted the final grades. Feeling good to continue my tiny part-time job for Zuckerberg's global fb enterprise for FREE! This is one type of "Happily Voluntarily Self-enslaved Businesses", which has some mutually beneficial socio-psychological effects, if posted properly (such as, I decided not to post poli-tick-religious issues as many as before: one of my self-enlightenments).

Ideological affairs are much shaped by upbringing (social class) and might be slightly influenced by various kinds of educational scopes - depending on pedagogy.

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許馨尹, 黃麗月, Christopher Michael and 4 others like this.

Crystal Huang Summer teaching is the most exciting and effective that I truly enjoy.
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Crystal Huang It is a daunting task to facilitate some Social Science courses (such as Diversity Studies, Sociology, Social Problems...etc). Ideological affairs are much shaped by upbringing (social class) and can be slightly influenced by various kinds of educational scopes, depending on pedagogy.

For example, the top one, has the "frames" while the bottom one - same frame.


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 July 23 (Th), 2015.  The end of semester reflection on the summer teaching.

Several ups and downs happened at the end of the summer classes and the irritating school scheduling issues were so easily forced you down to the depressed, lethargy, and tiresome routes. Though keeping the big smiles, being energetic and delightful in the classrooms and online environment during all the summer teaching sessions, the headache and heartache hammering every bit of my head and heart through those 10 days' student evaluations. Yes, I knew I was fine from the past student evals, but this invisible peeping Tom, like the hidden surveillance camera penetrating into your subconsciousness. This was the first time that the 8 weeks' summer teaching required 10 days' surveillance survey.

I am a person teaching most effectively when not surveyed. Student surveys, yes, give students right to guard against if the instructors apply more rigorous pedagogy, or demanding more students' time to engaging in learning.


 I just felt like quitting. This is a recurrent thought.  Quit.  Quit, to me is, in fact, quite a positive thought, much healthier than the thoughts of disappearing from the world.

They did again, suddenly changing my fall teaching schedule during the midterm of registration.
I have been the easy potato to this school, a typical Asian woman with the "typical positive stereotyped" images of being friendly, cooperative, helpful and generous, This is the 3rd time they did this to me.  As the Only minority faculty ever hired by this Department and by this College since 1912 (note, the whole school has 2 minority faculty among 268- 0.75% among all,  since 1912). What can you say and do - being a "Model Minority"?

Many times, you just walk and walk and talk and talk - where are guts, what are the issues - Don't ever hear about it nor ever think about it.  You don't have issues, and more obviously, you don't have guts. A single buffalo cannot communicate with a group of hyenas, not to mention a dare fight of an exhausted underdog,  The school has no issues. You only learn to keep quiet if you need to survive. 

Then I thought I needed to be seriously looking for different job to get rid of this group of ignorant white devils.

Just logging on Higher Ed Job seeking site, then an email alert sound rang from the school outlook. So I checked it. Surprise, it was from Hailey. Since it was Hailey, my expectation was not too bad. She is smart and hard-working student. Unless something she disagreed and wanted me to clarify, or some ideas not deep enough to satisfy her level of learning?  I had several uncertain expectations but not the irksome type of thoughts from the other kinds of irritating or horrific end-of-semester-emailers.

 Usually, at the end of semester, you expected those slackers, absentees, procrastinators, grade arguers, excusers, complainers, grouchy-grumblers, fuss-makers, finger-pointers, blamers, surely, never lack of the intimidaters, busily trafficking on your email.

But this one, from Hailey, just suddenly, made me stop browsing the Higher Education Job seeking sites.
I read her story that happened yesterday (our last day of Diversity Studies summer school of 2015). I responded to her with my proud, or partially flattered-felt heart. Later, I read second time, the tears started falling down. I was compelled by my emotion to share.  I thought all the downtime since yesterday the assistant informed me a drastic change of my teaching schedule, now this a little bit heart-warming ray of hope rose my spirit. I could see her serious learning demeanors in class.

---

From: Huang, Crystal
Sent: Thursday, July 23, 2015 11:41 AM
To: Chirhart, Hailey
Subject: RE:

Dear Hailey, thanks for sharing this insightful event.  You just strengthened my belief in the great teachers Myles Horton and Paulo Freire - education is the most powerful tool to make a difference and lead to social change, no matter big or small, non-seeable in the life time, or foreseeable in the future.

I am very proud of you and I know you might have lost a date. But you deserve much better - a wiser, compassionate, well-educated who is just like you -  the seeds of better future.   Thanks for sharing.  Keep in touch.  Crystal

Huang, Crystal

Inbox, students

Thursday, July 23, 2015 11:31 AM

You replied on 7/23/2015 11:41 AM.

Hello Crystal,

I understand that the semester is over and maybe you do not expect to hear from some of your students ever again, but I felt the need to share the following story with you. 

Last night I went on a date with a man, he was white I feel the need to say that because the following events was not something I expected. I agreed to go out with this man for dinner, he picked me up, and we went to the restaurant. We went inside and the waiter asked, "Table for two?" The man I was with suddenly said, "No, I think we changed our minds." He turned around and started to head out of the restaurant so I followed behind. We got into his truck and went to another restaurant. We ate, talked, and then left. On the way back home I asked him why we left the first restaurant. He said didn't you see the two flamers sitting at the table together? At first I wasn't sure how to respond to this, a number of things we discussed in class ran through my mind, the discrimination and stereotyping this man was displaying was almost repulsive. He said you like gay people? I said I don't have a problem with them. He said well I do. I asked why and he said because they're disgusting and I don't want to see or approve of two men being together, I'm the same way with blacks I cant stand niggers. I questioned what I was going to say to that so I asked him why he specifically didn't like them. He never gave me an actual reason. He dropped me off and that was the end of it. Today he asked if he could have a second date, I asked him if he would ever consider opening up his mind to at least tolerate people who are different than him, he said there's no way I'll ever change. And I said well I don't think I will be able to tolerate a second date then. 

I don't know if I handled the situation properly, maybe I should tried harder to open his mind, but he seemed very adamant about staying in his ways of thinking. I felt like I had to share this story with you because before I had taken this class I wouldn't have asked the man why, and I probably would've went on a second date with him. I don't know if you feel like you really connect, make a difference, and affect those you teach, but I can say from the bottom of my heart that you opened my mind to things I was oblivious to see before and things I was ignorant enough to just ignore. I hope to stay in contact and keep in touch with you as I continue on my pursuit to become a Nurse. 

Hailey Chirhart